Planning is the key
Many times I hear mothers complain from the lack of time, the multitude of tasks and how constantly they are over whelmed with their daily duties. When I suggest planning I hear things like “but how can I plan”, “Everyday there are new surprises”, “all the days are just messy”, “I don’t know how to stick to a plan” and so on. For me these are just an example of giving lame excuses (sorry for being honest). Why do you think there are mothers more successful than others? Planning is the answer and until you realize the importance of planning, you have one of two choices; either stop complaining and accept your messy situation or try to embrace a new way of thinking.
For me planning is more than essential, it has been my favorite life companion ever since I can remember. Having my to-do-list is an inevitable part of my life and the funny thing I have it for my personal as well as professional lives. Now that I am staying at home for my babies for some time, I can’t go on without my house duties’ to-do-list. I write every week what I need to do over the week and what I need to accomplish around the weekdays so I am left out almost free over the weekend. Of course a mother is never free but I choose to cook all week but not on the weekend. I choose to get done with the laundry across the week but not on the weekend. I intentionally buy all the things I need from the supermarket across the week so as not to waste my weekend in grocery shopping (when I would prefer to do some real shopping).
Instead of being overwhelmed and complain and end up finishing nothing Learn to PRIORITIZE. Select the most important tasks to be done and divide those urgent tasks among the week. If every day you do one major task, it will feel way better and you won’t feel (in a certain way) the multitude of the job. Target to have a free weekend (No major house chores); for me it feels good as I am kind of free from the major routine tasks, still there will be things here and there but no cooking, no laundry, no cleaning, etc. Keep a to-do-list in your kitchen for important stuff; I keep a small magnetic white board on my fridge for important dates, apportionments or reminders that can’t be missed.
From experience, I can tell you that there is no way out of the motherly tasks nor can you decrease the duties but for sure you can make your life better if you decide to make it easier. A good mother is not a free one, but rather someone who can plan her house and be smart in doing her tasks and still find time for herself.
Monday, June 30, 2014
Sunday, June 15, 2014
Joys of being a mother
Many times I feel that we mothers give a bad impression about maternity to moms-to-be or to girls who fear getting pregnant because of what we continuously convey. I am not negating the fact that being a mother is overwhelming. I am not trying to prove it is not; on the contrary for me having to take care of twins without a nanny (which is a choice I am proud to have made) is even more overwhelming than being a mother for one baby. But the point is while we always tend to complain, we forget to highlight the blessings and joys of being mothers. Today I decided I will shed some light on the joys rather than the burdens for a change. While I will still keep talking about the burdens in the future and how to make it better, I hope you enjoy reading this for now… when you are a mother;
1- You start to look at your life with a different angle: your life no longer revolves around you. Now that you have kids, their own well-being and pleasure is much more important than yours. You can’t eat if they are hungry, you can’t rest if they are awake, you can’t have your me-time if they need you. Your own needs are not a priority anymore but rather a luxury and you do that so willingly from your heart.
2- The motherhood feeling of taking care of your kids is a real enjoyment: No matter how tiring it is, I still enjoy the feeling that I am responsible for them. I love taking care of their needs and enjoy doing them all the things they love.
3- Watching the world through their eyes is one of the purest things about having kids. It is so nice to look at life the way they do where their trouble revolves around a toy that they want to play with or a cartoon that they want to watch. When I go to the entertainment center with them, for few hours, I tend to forget the harsh life we are living it and try to get mad with them enjoying some rides.
4- Seeing your kids grow is another pleasure of life. Although my kids are not 3 years yet but seeing them develop from being babies to trying to be more dependent and playing alone is amazing. Seeing each kid develop a character is beyond enjoyable, I feel I am growing up my new best friends whom I want to be friends with till my last breath.
5- I was never a believer of a true best friend, I tend to be suspicious and my one and only trust worthy friend has always been my mother. Now I feel that I have genuine people in my life who truly loves me, I just hope they love as much as I love my mother.
6- Sharing their fun things with them is also a priceless experience. For me I love to sit, play and color with them. It distracts me from the world’s pressures and is just so much fun. Take the time to do that; if you enjoy it a bit, it will be the time of their lives. They really do appreciate being close to us and interacting with us more than we could think.
7- Enjoying their random hugs and kisses is my favorite part of being a mother. When they hug me or kiss me for no reason, I feel I don’t want that moment to end; it makes me feel life is worth living and that I am going through a lot of hassle’s but it is worth it. More often than not, I feel I need this hug to assure me that the world is still pure, kind and sweet
8- Being a mother teaches you how to deal with fears you never knew existed.
9- They are a source of daily inspiration for us. They are mini purer version of us. One day my sister told me a description that I cherished and wished to keep in my heart forever, she said your kids are angels that have not been stained by the filthy world we live in. It is true, sometimes when I look at them; I feel pity for they don’t know how harsh life is.
10- One of the dearest moments I love is seeing their eyes light up when they see something they love or when they get a toy that wanted. Sometimes I try to get them any simple thing just to see this excitement and happiness. It takes few seconds but makes me feel accomplished and fills me with joy for the whole day.
Many times I feel that we mothers give a bad impression about maternity to moms-to-be or to girls who fear getting pregnant because of what we continuously convey. I am not negating the fact that being a mother is overwhelming. I am not trying to prove it is not; on the contrary for me having to take care of twins without a nanny (which is a choice I am proud to have made) is even more overwhelming than being a mother for one baby. But the point is while we always tend to complain, we forget to highlight the blessings and joys of being mothers. Today I decided I will shed some light on the joys rather than the burdens for a change. While I will still keep talking about the burdens in the future and how to make it better, I hope you enjoy reading this for now… when you are a mother;
1- You start to look at your life with a different angle: your life no longer revolves around you. Now that you have kids, their own well-being and pleasure is much more important than yours. You can’t eat if they are hungry, you can’t rest if they are awake, you can’t have your me-time if they need you. Your own needs are not a priority anymore but rather a luxury and you do that so willingly from your heart.
2- The motherhood feeling of taking care of your kids is a real enjoyment: No matter how tiring it is, I still enjoy the feeling that I am responsible for them. I love taking care of their needs and enjoy doing them all the things they love.
3- Watching the world through their eyes is one of the purest things about having kids. It is so nice to look at life the way they do where their trouble revolves around a toy that they want to play with or a cartoon that they want to watch. When I go to the entertainment center with them, for few hours, I tend to forget the harsh life we are living it and try to get mad with them enjoying some rides.
4- Seeing your kids grow is another pleasure of life. Although my kids are not 3 years yet but seeing them develop from being babies to trying to be more dependent and playing alone is amazing. Seeing each kid develop a character is beyond enjoyable, I feel I am growing up my new best friends whom I want to be friends with till my last breath.
5- I was never a believer of a true best friend, I tend to be suspicious and my one and only trust worthy friend has always been my mother. Now I feel that I have genuine people in my life who truly loves me, I just hope they love as much as I love my mother.
6- Sharing their fun things with them is also a priceless experience. For me I love to sit, play and color with them. It distracts me from the world’s pressures and is just so much fun. Take the time to do that; if you enjoy it a bit, it will be the time of their lives. They really do appreciate being close to us and interacting with us more than we could think.
7- Enjoying their random hugs and kisses is my favorite part of being a mother. When they hug me or kiss me for no reason, I feel I don’t want that moment to end; it makes me feel life is worth living and that I am going through a lot of hassle’s but it is worth it. More often than not, I feel I need this hug to assure me that the world is still pure, kind and sweet
8- Being a mother teaches you how to deal with fears you never knew existed.
9- They are a source of daily inspiration for us. They are mini purer version of us. One day my sister told me a description that I cherished and wished to keep in my heart forever, she said your kids are angels that have not been stained by the filthy world we live in. It is true, sometimes when I look at them; I feel pity for they don’t know how harsh life is.
10- One of the dearest moments I love is seeing their eyes light up when they see something they love or when they get a toy that wanted. Sometimes I try to get them any simple thing just to see this excitement and happiness. It takes few seconds but makes me feel accomplished and fills me with joy for the whole day.
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